kind of grateful

I've been feeling really ungrateful the past couple of days. Unlike last year, I didn't even think of a weekly gratitude blog post. (Even though I was grateful for kind of odd things, they did actually signify greater things.) And I'm taking a lot for granted this year that I didn't have last year -- I no longer have hot flashes, or a hole in my leg, or have to wear a wig. Not to mention the opportunities I have to serve in my singles ward. I mean, life is kind of a lot awesomer this year. And I haven't really appreciated it much.

Last week I had to give a talk on gratitude (also my mission, which I also don't express appropriate gratitude for), and my mother can attest that I was really ungrateful for the opportunity. Seriously, I don't know what's wrong with me and my ingratitude these days. It's simply shameful.

So, as it's now Thanksgiving Week, I'm going to try to be better about expressing my gratitude. I'm going to start with something that struck me when I was listening to Music and the Spoken Word this morning. Brother Newell (is that okay to call him?) mentioned an anecdote of someone giving a coworker the Heimlich maneuver, and how gratitude was felt by both parties -- by the one, for having his life saved, and by the other, for the knowledge he had and the wisdom to use it.

Today our ward choir sang in sacrament meeting. They did an awesome job, and I am so thankful for everyone that came![1] I overheard quite a few compliments about how nice they sounded. I was the pianist, and not only was I grateful that others came, I was really glad that I had the ability to really bring music out of the piano to accentuate the message. That's something I've always been grateful for, but sometimes I forget. Even my mediocre performance on the organ today was something to be grateful for -- at least I can play, and at least I have the opportunity to practice and sound better than I would've otherwise (no joke).

I'm also grateful that I can elucidate my ideas. I accomplished my goal of commenting in Sunday School (as a teacher, I now feel I have an obligation to participate) and was able to get my point across even when I was still working it out in my head. Brother Smith (haha, it's weird to call peers that) was grateful for my comment, and I was too. See how this is starting to work?

This strikes me as coming across just a little conceited (look at what I can do!), but that's not the point. The point is that I am grateful that I've been given these gifts, and the opportunities to use them to bless others. I hope to be able to recognize other things to be grateful for later this week and stop being such an ungrateful drag.


"The Last Snowfall"[2]

[1] Side note: in an odd reversal, we had for our performance today 7 guys and 4 girls.
[2] Coincidentally, yesterday and today mark the first real snowfall of winter. Not the last snowfall.