still trying to sing your songs

BYU got me into the habit of singing the hymns loudly. Not that I didn't sing out before -- in fact, our family and the one that sat behind us were kind of bastions of songs of praise -- but confidence is higher when the entire room is singing their hearts out. My wards at BYU were invariably like this. It was amazing.

Then I go to Stake Conference and we sing songs people don't know and I am the only one I can hear in the entire gym. Yeah, that was fun.

That was an exception, of course. There's not more than 4 stake conferences this year, and most of the time I do what everyone else does and sit with my family in the ward. Then I only have to worry about my 13-year-old sister's glares when I sing too exuberantly, and especially when I sing the tenor line. She doesn't care that I've moved between all the parts since she was born (give or take a year or two), it bugs her now.

There are other ways BYU has spoiled me, but one in particular I noticed this Sunday was in the choir. As I mentioned we had Conference -- it was Regional, which meant all the stakes in Cache Valley were in attendance and there was an enormous choir composed of USU students: 876 singers.[1] The cameras were on them as they sang, but it seemed weird. Maybe it was the fact that camerapeople are different here than at my alma mater, but I didn't enjoy watching them much at all. I didn't see anyone I knew[2] and all the boys were ugly.

That was my opinion for the first song, then I realized that it simply couldn't be true, so I paid better attention during the second song. There were a few attractive young men, and many of them I would have found pleasing to the eye were they sporting blue-and-gold-striped ties and blazers[3], but I was still overall unimpressed.

Why is BYU different? I'm not sure; last I heard the ecclesiastical endorsement doesn't involve a tap with a magic wand to become more appealing. It was quite strange. However, I am now resigned to the fact that the faces I saw on Sunday are my dating pool now (only 400 men boohoo ... plus the thousands that didn't make it to choir) and I'm sure I'll get over my feelings of being an underage freshman as I walk through the Institute building where I work. I'm older than some RMs now, after all.

Anyway, those were my thoughts this weekend. Regional Conference was very good. I'd been moody for a few days and starting to clash with my siblings (they're the only people I see! And they're young and annoying! And I'm bossy!) and the talks Saturday night really told me off about that. And since Sunday morning was all General Authorities (Elder Rasband, Sister Lant, Elder Ballard, President Eyring) it was of course uplifting and inspiring. I'm going to take the shrink-wrap off my brand-new mission journal and jot down my thoughts.


"Grandmother Song" ~ Vienna Teng


[1] I had planned initially to be one of these singers, but the one rehearsal I went to reminded me why choir is so frustrating, especially sitting by diva altos. And also it was too difficult to sit on a hard chair for two hours (on the "padded" bench in the stake center I almost died). So I was merely a spectator.
[2] apart from the [stereotypes abound] short fat balding guy that was the only person to introduce himself to me at the rehearsal -- he was on the front row directly behind the podium
[3] I'll spell it out if I must: Men's Chorus.